Subject: Kim Namjoon, born September 12, 1994 — Virgo

Performed: August 16, 2021

Original Post Date: August 19, 2021

Video Version Uploaded: September 26, 2021

Spread: Past Life Reading by BlueMoonPunch

Deck: Sacred Geometry Activations Oracle, Rider-Waite Tarot, Tarotwave Tarot, Spirit Animal Oracle, Wisdom of The Oracle, Moonology Oracle

Time: 4 hours

Details: The Past Life Reading is an intuitive and channeled reading that pinpoints the most prominent past life that is currently influencing an individual’s current incarnation.

Video Version Available!

CW: There are discussions and descriptions of suicide in this reading.

There’s quite a lot to get into with this one as it has been well over a year since I last did a reading for Namjoon, two years since I did a big, in-depth reading for him. First, as usual, I wanted to start with really feeling into his core energy and seeing what kind of visuals I could get of his inner world and a lot came through.

In case you’ve forgotten, the last time I really got a good picture of Namjoon’s inner world, a visual reflection of his core state, it was something like a wide-open field, lots of grass, lots of green, but everything, the sun, was so bright that you could hardly make out what you were really looking at. It was very dreamy and peaceful. Now, it’s much different. There is still grass and green, but it’s much duller now, the light is nearly gone, and it’s almost as if there has been a big storm or even a flood as the ground itself is so soft it feels like you’re sinking into it as you stand there.

The world itself feels small and once I got more settled into the space, it started to look like I was standing inside of a fishbowl, glass walls curving up and around toward a large opening overhead, the space being no more than ten or twelve feet in diameter. Namjoon was standing in the middle, sunken into the ground up to his knees, head craned back and staring up at the sky through this opening. The clouds were dark and moving slowly, with no traces of sun or a blue sky. Before, Namjoon, in this space and on a soul level, would seem distant and detached as he was sitting on a much higher plane, vibrating at a higher frequency. In a way, he didn’t really hold form, and therefore neither did his world, but now everything feels very grounded, very present, but it doesn’t seem to be to his liking.

There was this distracted feeling to him as he stood there, and when I moved around to stand in front of him, I could see that his chest was hollow, just this odd gaping hole in his torso. Inside there was this small rod of light, very dim and flickering. At this point, I hadn’t really said anything or tried to actually connect consciously, like no effort to communicate, so it just kind of slipped out, me asking, “where did your soul go?” This seemed to trigger something in this space, and the feeling of it almost reminded me of that first relationship reading I did for Jimin and Kook where I overstepped a boundary on Kook’s side and he energetically punched me in the face. It was that level of sudden aggravation and hostility, however, here, none of it was directed at me.

It happened very quickly but it was such a clear picture. The soft and mushy ground shifted and rose up on one side of this fishbowl, mimicking a large wave that sloshed around the bowl once before slamming into Namjoon. Namjoon then disintegrated into the soil, became one with it, and just… blended in. It wasn’t like he was gone, I could still feel him there, but it was like he became a whisper, if that makes sense. I didn’t feel at all like I was being pushed out, or like I was being told directly to not ask certain things or look into certain things, it just felt like he didn’t want to be looked at, especially from the front.

I did spend a bit more time in this space, trying to get a better idea of why Namjoon’s inner world is what it is now. A lot of more personal stuff, personal on a soul level, came up and a lot of it reminded me of Jimin in the way that, at one point, he was very resistant to a massive shift or transition on a soul level, which lined up with the deconstruction of the Soul Body. His world became broken and eventually started to look like some kind of warped mosaic of what the collective Soul Body looked like from his position. There’s resistance in Namjoon on a soul level, and on a conscious level I imagine, toward a transition where he is essentially falling away from his higher vibrational standing, losing his connection to his own higher awareness, and thus feeling very trapped, lost, as if he is sinking inside of a fishbowl, unable to see the sun.

This transition lines up with his detachment from the Soul Body, his integration process, and the transition he shares with Kook where Namjoon is to become more internally oriented while Kook becomes more externally oriented. In this state of internal focus, Namjoon would naturally become less connected to things and people outside of himself, become more introverted, but also, less intuitively inclined, less sure on a soul level, as the whole point is to reconnect with his more… human self, his more grounded, centered and superficial self. It sounds dramatic, but it has a fallen angel vibe to it. He’s falling away from his position as the Crown, detaching from his inner knowing, grounding into the more bleak and superficial physical reality, and with that, the personal perceived spirituality and philosophy that he held as a foundation for so many years have begun to crumble. Pretty much everything for Namjoon is deconstructing while, in comparison, everything for Kook is being constructed and fully fleshed out. Namjoon is losing his sense of self while Kook is finding it.

But how is this showing up on a conscious level for Namjoon? Let’s take a look.

These are the cards I pulled in relation to the current state of Namjoon’s core, and it pretty much reflects exactly what I was seeing, as well as what one could assume is occurring on a conscious level in relation to it.

First off, The Wheel of Fortune sits there at the top representing that major shift or transition that Namjoon is currently going through, and has been going through for a while, this descent. Understandably so, on a soul level, he is experiencing this as the 9 of Swords, as a nightmare, something traumatic. The 5 of Pentacles is, as I was seeing it, representative of how he clings to the previous state, the higher vibration, the higher awareness, the sense of purpose overall. Essentially, he was once the church itself, now he is one of the two people outside the church, injured and looking for help.

On a conscious level, this is reflected as the 5 of Cups, as a deeper, more personal sense of mourning. Specifically, he is mourning The Lovers, a card I always see more as a show of higher connection and personal alignment with Adam being the conscious mind, Eve being the subconscious or intuitive/receptive mind, and the Angel above being the unconscious mind or the Higher Self. The three cups in the image of the 5 of Cups seem to suggest that he sees all three components of The Lovers as fallen or broken in some way, rather than just Adam and Eve, or the conscious and subconscious mind, losing connection to the Higher Self. In other words, without that full connection, that higher connection, or sense of self-assuredness, he may find it hard to trust himself or his current path forward.

The 4 of Pentacles is like a conscious version of the soul’s 5 of Pentacles. He’s holding on like hell to the previous framework, the previous mindsets, routines, manner of function overall for the sake of feeling stable. With that, the 6 of Swords in reverse shows a refusal to make that transition, even though things around him in his physical reality, as well as internally, may be urging him to do so.

This is quite a position to be in and one that can come with a lot of heavy feelings. I myself have struggled with something like this, and it’s very hard to see it in the moment but this is really a matter of recalibration. It’s a matter of being pulled from one higher state to be put into another higher state, but the transition itself involves being pulled down first, which gives one time to root back into the physical space, the physical body, to kind of reinvigorate the personal will and perception of reality and your place in it. It seems like a dramatic process but it’s pretty simple when it’s all said and done.

What’s interesting is that the past life that we’ll be looking at for him in this reading is one that holds influence over this current state, this state of transition, and it does so in an odd way. I’m writing this bit after I’ve already done the whole reading, so I’m saying this in hindsight, but there’s this interesting layered process around grief, self-blame, loss of control, and self-imposed isolation.

Again, speaking in hindsight, this set of cards here reflects a step-by-step process experienced in this past life and the process currently being experienced now in this lifetime. Superficially, in terms of how things are playing out in his physical life, the two experiences are worlds apart, but how they are playing out on a soul level, they are exactly the same. For the sake of flow, I’ll explain this bit in relation to Namjoon’s current lifetime and current process of transition.

Essentially, right now, Namjoon is that center bit, the lowest bit, the 10 of Swords, but he started out as Temperance and The High Priestess. Temperance is more in line with his Higher Self, that higher aspect of purpose over balance and influence, while The High Priestess is more about his unconscious receptivity and implementation, his place and purpose as a conduit. From there, his personal power, his more conscious and superficial confidence, and his sense of self-control and creative freedom are represented there by the Page of Wands. These three cards together perfectly sum up Namjoon’s overall state of being and experience for the last 15+ years. It holds not only his own progression and development but his influence and guidance over the development and progression of his followers, his audience, people around him, and so on.

Coming off of that, there is the 5 of Wands where things get very messy and tangled. It’s like the Page of Wands was minding his own business and suddenly he was ambushed by all of these other people, all of these outside influences that seem to just want to work against him. They seem to, on the surface, rip him out of his own self-control, his own creative freedom, create obstacles and tear down what he has built, and maybe that is what they are doing, but on a higher level, this is something being done with purpose. The Chariot there, though descending, shows that the trip to the 10 of Swords is one that was and is meant to be made. Of course, Namjoon is currently hanging around the 9 of Swords, suggesting again that resistance to actually completing that transition, closing off that previous chapter of his own development, stuck in mourning and filled with grief around what was and what will never be again.

The 10 of Swords really does serve as the finality to the whole thing, the everything that was curated by Temperance and The High Priestess, all of it is simply finished and there is no longer a purpose to serve on a higher level for Namjoon, just as there was no longer a purpose to the Soul Body, which is why it was deconstructed. As I’ve mentioned a million times in a million other readings, the deconstruction of the Soul Body, the detachment of the individual souls from one another, would allow them to each pursue what they wanted, to experience more individualistic soul development. That’s what’s meant to happen for Namjoon as well, and that’s where he’s heading, but because he was so high up, there does need to be some level of descent for him to even experience it. And, of course, descending from such a high place can feel like the world is ending, or like a whole chunk of your life and experience is slipping away from you, leaving you to feel lost and almost like half a person as you identify so closely with those previous experiences as they literally were part of your entire soul purpose, your entire reason for existing, at one point.

The 3 of Swords, shown to be ascending from the 10 of Swords, where Namjoon is stuck and hiding behind the 9 of Swords, is that moment of acceptance, where the mourning or grief doesn’t feel so stuck and rigid but instead feels like a stream of emotion, a release that actually allows things to move forward. In my mind, just because of the images on the card, I can see the 9 of Swords being that image of Namjoon standing in the middle of the fishbowl staring up at the grey sky, while the 3 of Swords is that moment where it finally rains, and it rains enough that the bowl fills up and he swims to the top and makes it out into a new world. It’s just that the weather is completely controlled by him, so he’s really just waiting for himself to accept this new phase of his life and experience. The 10 of Swords would be on par with him actually allowing the rain to fall.

Justice, a card I consider to be the more conscious and superficial version of Temperance, follows this release and acceptance in the 3 of Swords. If we were to apply that again to the image of Namjoon’s inner world, Justice would be the point in which he lands on the ground outside of the fishbowl and gets used to walking on land that he doesn’t sink into. It’s about acclimating to a new space, a new mindset, reprioritizing things on a conscious level, maybe even getting a new sense of identity and self-proclaimed purpose. This is a very mentally stimulating state, probably a lot of inspiration or a sudden realization that with all this new space, this lack of clean-cut purpose, he actually has a lot of freedom and can kind of do whatever he wants. It’s like, right now, he feels like he can’t do anything because what he wants to do is pretty much to run the routine of what he did and has been doing for years. That structure, that framework is no longer there, it’s no longer useful, and all and all, it’s burnt out. Right now, the freedom of new, unexplored, and wide-open space and opportunity seems like a bad thing simply because it is unfamiliar and seemingly outside of his control. This sentiment seems to be shared between both the conscious and soul state.

With Justice bringing about a new vision, identity, and outlook, the 2 of Pentacles follows as a more physical, conscious, externally-oriented alteration and balancing of the outside function. The 2 of Pentacles itself is all about balancing work and home life, as well as the inner and outer worlds as suggested by the mirroring of the juggled pentacles and the rolling waves in the background. In this state, he’s not just thinking about his new vision, identity, or outlook, he’s owning it, implementing it, prioritizing it, and creating a new wave of fulfillment for himself.

This leads into the new “higher state,” the new version of what Temperance and The High Priestess were for him for some time now. The Hermit is exactly what I was thinking of when it comes to Namjoon becoming more internally oriented, more self-focused. The Hermit comes away from everyone and everything, locks himself away within himself, or up in the mountains, and there he observes the world around him, comes to understand the rhyme and reasons behind everything, understands his place within all of it, and from there, finds peace and understanding, finds acceptance for his life and life itself, finds appreciation for his experience overall.

Just in the layout of these cards, it’s like The Hermit is above everything, looking back on everything between Temperance and the 2 of Pentacles, looking at the wave-like pattern, understanding the flow of it and purpose behind it, how one state bled into another so perfectly. He can see the pattern of it, can understand it, and therefore holds no resentment for it, nor would he hold resentment or resistance to similar phases he may experience in the future.

Main Reading:

When it came to actually connecting and looking into the most prominent past life that is currently influencing Namjoon, I was surprised that, much like his core, the visuals came along pretty vividly. I still had the same amount of struggle to expand past the initial image, things getting abstract and such, but I was able to get a relatively full picture of what went on and how it applies to the current state. As I mentioned, the experience itself was worlds away from what Namjoon is experiencing now superficially, but the two different experiences affect the soul the same way, thus Namjoon seems to be accessing certain lessons or unfulfilled markers from this past life.

Just for the sake of not confusing myself too much, I’m going to relay everything in the order that I have it in my notes. It’s a little choppy at first as I was getting things piece by piece, but I think it’s kind of interesting to see how everything comes together.

The first thing I saw was a man, dark skin, dark hair, wearing light blue overalls and standing alongside the edge of a cliff or a hill, admiring a small garden. I kept getting the word “farmer” and it was making me laugh given the size of the garden, but he seemed quite proud to refer to himself as a farmer. This place that he lived was very interesting as it seemed like a flat top to a hill, not quite in the mountains, but maybe near a mountainous area. For this I kept getting Turkey — either he was from Turkey, or this place is in Turkey and he moved there at some point in his life. Everything seemed well-manicured, the garden was well taken care of and it seemed like the grass had been trimmed. The only thing that stuck out to me as odd in the beginning was that there were no trees other than a small one that had clearly been planted and taken care of on the far corner of the land.

I later realized the reason that there were no trees around was that he had cut them down in order to build this little shack-like home and then planted that one tree to kind of add some life back into the place. There weren’t that many trees there to begin with and the little shack was quite small, only fitting a very small bed, which was made out of the cut wood and a mattress that was just a sheet stuffed with grass. There was a little stove-type thing and a water basin where he brushed his teeth. Everything else was sort of left to nature I suppose. I made more than one note about the fact that the roof of this little hut was weird-looking, and then I realized it was because the roof was made out of the tree bark, like segmented sheets of tree bark. It worked well as a roof, it just looked kind of funny to me.

So, all of that came through very clearly, and once I started to pull back from these initial images, tried to go a bit into his past, that was when things began to get a bit more abstract. I did see the point at which he first went up onto this hill or mountain. This was a big giveaway that this was in the early 1970s as he straight up waltzed in with bell-bottoms, white tennis shoes, and an orange and beige t-shirt that seemed to have some kind of three-man band logo on it. I couldn’t make out what it said though.

He was very young when he went up there, maybe around twenty-three to twenty-seven. He had brought up a big green bag, like a tote bag type thing, and I did see that he was using that as a pillow, stuffed with grass like the mattress later on. He only brought a few things, not nearly as much as you would assume one would need in order to cut down a bunch of trees and build a farm and whatnot, but it did seem like he did go down to shop a lot.

The most interesting thing that I got at this point was “a vow of silence.” I had made a note that this was “very Hermit,” referring to The Hermit in Tarot, as he was so up and away from everything, detached from everyone, and that feeling seemed to follow him even down the hill. It was explained as a vow of silence, he was choosing to not only live alone away from other people but to completely disconnect from all human connection, going as far as shrouding himself in public. It was kind of odd.

Things were starting to get foggy and difficult to make out, and I just kept asking why is he doing this, why is he living alone, why does he not want to be around people, why is going this far to separate himself. I lingered on the idea of something religious or spiritual, and there was some weight to that, but it was much heavier, it felt like an obligation or even a punishment. Once I got to that idea it was spelled out very clearly, quite literally visually spelled out, that it was related to suicide. Not his own suicide, but the suicide of someone close to him. Their death was the reason he decided to continue his life in isolation.

That was still pretty vague to me, didn’t answer a lot of questions, not many people commit to living their lives off the grid purely out of grief, so I pushed a little further and got this very mashed up, abstract image. What I saw first was this chalkboard sign, like the ones you would see in front of cafes in cities on television. Just the letter “A” was written on it. From my position, I was looking down at the sign and I could see a white tiled floor and a light blue wall that cut the peripheral vision in half. There was water pooling on the floor, and floating in that water was a small, fuzzy red ball, similar to a cat toy.

I was confused, but I took the “A” as a literal reference to an “Answer.” Not necessarily an answer to my question, but an answer in general, maybe an answer to something he himself had been wondering. The red ball I then interpreted as blood. Often times in abstract images like this, especially around traumatic memories, more morbid or upsetting imagery will be replaced with something less threatening or scary — such as bloody water on the floor being replaced with clear water and a floating red cat toy. I tried to step into this room further, to look beyond that blue wall, but instantly I heard very clearly, “don’t go any further, don’t look up.”

It was said like a mantra, just over and over again, and the more I tried to push forward the more frantic it became. I never did get to see what was in that room beyond the blue wall and I think that’s mainly because he himself never went in there, therefore it’s not part of his memory, not part of something I would be able to see. I then relaxed and stopped trying to push, and that’s when I was pulled away from the door. At this moment the only way I could describe it is that I was seeing everything from his perspective, but did not have any control over where I went or what I looked at. I just allowed things to flow from here as the abstract nature of everything started to become clearer as I did.

So, from his perspective, it seemed that this was actually a hotel room and the white tiled floor and blue wall was the bathroom. As you walk into the bathroom you are met with that blue wall first, then you would have to walk around to the left and step in in order to see the bathtub which was directly on the other side of the wall. When he pushed the door open he saw the water and the slight traces of blood and pulled back immediately. There was this very strong wave of panic but there was no question, he already knew that the person inside was dead and knew what had happened.

The eery part was how focused everything became on the fact that it was so quiet. This freaked me out a lot as it made me think of what it was like when I found my mom after she had died. I kind of already knew she was dead before I opened her door because of how quiet it was downstairs, not even the dogs were barking which they usually did when I came downstairs. There’s just something off-putting about how quiet it can be while you’re essentially witnessing part of your reality crumble right in front of you.

It actually took me a while to even figure out who this person was. I could see that it was a woman, but I could not tell how they were related to him at all. It was a very deep bond and there was enough of a bond that he instantly started to blame himself in such a harsh way. What made me understand who this woman was was the fact that the only clear thing that was running through his mind at that moment as he was just standing frozen in the hotel room trying to process everything was, “she killed herself because I didn’t bring strawberry milk.”

Strange, right? It was being stated so calmly in comparison to how panicked and in shock he was, and I really tried to focus on strawberry milk and its connection between the two. I was seeing everything through a layer of fog, but I could see there was this near-obsessive or fanatic quality to this girl’s like of strawberry milk. It’s such a specific thing, but that was just what she liked. I saw that she had this really cute baby pink crop top with red ruffles on the bottom of the short sleeves and the hem with “Strawberry Milk” written across the chest in white cursive letters. She had strawberry milk cartons and strawberry stickers on a blue plastic binder, and she had strawberry milk carton patches on her denim book bag.

It became clear to me that this girl was his younger sister as I was seeing a lot of memory-based images of them as children, and this strawberry milk obsession seemed to be something that was a quality of hers since she was little. The incredibly harsh and immediate self-blame came from the fact that he was her older brother, someone who was supposed to know her enough to see this coming and he didn’t. The “she killed herself because I didn’t bring strawberry milk,” thing came from a kind of shock-response to given reason to the situation alongside that self-blame.

Everything else kind of fell into place after this, so I’ll just reiterate things in the order that they played out.

Basically, in this past life, Namjoon seemed to have a bit of a troubled childhood, not necessarily horrific, but unstable and worrisome enough that he, even as a young child, felt the need to be very protective and almost parental toward his sister who seemed to be anywhere from seven to ten years younger than him. It did seem like his sister struggled with mental health issues, seemingly connected to trauma that wasn’t fully understood or even known about by him.

At some point, I think perhaps to go to school or to work, he moved into a city area. His sister would have been around fifteen at the time. She struggled a lot being left alone with their parents and eventually he flew her out to the city from where they lived. He had set her up with that hotel room, not sure why she wasn’t going to stay with him unless he had roommates or lived on campus, but the plan was for them to meet up at this cafe or restaurant that was literally right next door to this hotel. It was on his mind that he was going to get her strawberry milk at this cafe. He waited for her down there, assuming she was just getting stuff around, having just gotten there, but she didn’t come down. So, of course, he eventually just went up to her room and that’s where he found her. She had slit her wrists in the bathtub of this hotel room. There was focus at one point on the fact that she didn’t even take anything out of her suitcase or turn the lights on in the room, almost as if she walked in, tossed her bags on the bed, and went straight for the bathroom.

There was a tremendous amount of grief here and he blamed himself for this matter. The vow of silence thing came about as a kind of self-punishment. The sentiment was that if he couldn’t hear her crying out for help or see that she was in trouble, no one should ever see or hear him. This didn’t go over too well as he was in a city and going to school or working, meaning people were seeing and talking to him a lot. His inability to actually stay silent or hidden away in this space is what led him to move away, I think to a completely different country, where he literally would not be able to speak even if he wanted to as he would not be able to speak the language. That is where he made himself a home and lived off the land. That initial image I had of him was when he was in his forties or fifties, his sister died when he was around 23-25, and I believe he made this move around the age of 26 or 27.

The way this past life experience is influencing him now is, in a sense, urging him to reverse the way he dealt with the healing of it but prompting similar avenues of the initial response. What carries over is the aspect of grief and self-blame around the deconstruction of life based on a sense of loss or a disruption of one’s own reality and sense of stability. In this past life, the loss was more superficial, something external, to which he responded by going fully internal, detaching from the outside world. Now, in his current incarnation, the loss is purely internal, something more in the soul, that is then being attributed to external factors. His initial response, and his projected path with The Hermit, will be to detach again, become more hidden or quiet. The difference that is being laid out is that in this past life, he died on that hill at some point, he died in silence, invisible to the world. In this current incarnation, he will be prompted to heal and come out into the open again, connect with people, to speak more, but only after he has gone through his Hermit mode and experienced that healing.

Childhood:

Most Prominent Influence: Third-Eye Chakra

Supplementary Energies/Timeline: 7 of Pentacles + King of Cups + 4 of Wands (rev.)

In this past life, Namjoon’s childhood seemed to be one where he had to grow up quick, having to hold a lot of patience, maturity, and stability as the 7 of Pentacles and King of Cups would suggest. This was supported with the higher influence of the Third-Eye, a more intuitive base that allowed him to recognize his unstable environment, represented by the reversed 4 of Wands, and adapt accordingly in order to create a better foundation for himself and his sister.

Teen Years:

Most Prominent Influence: Universal Love

Supplementary Energies/Timeline: Queen of Swords (rev.) + 8 of Swords (rev.) + 4 of Pentacles (rev.)

Compared to his childhood years, the teen years experienced a major upheaval. Really, it seems like teenage rebellion but not in a majorly significant way, more like a typical response of a troubled teen living in a troubled environment. The Universal Love influence feels like an amped-up version of the Third Eye here in the sense that his sensitivity overall kicked into high gear and created this emotionally stimulated yet stunted phase.

The reversed Queen of Swords is this cold and callous attitude as if he was trying to not seem as affected by everything as he was. The reversed 8 of Swords is almost like a perfect representative of what he could have been hiding behind the Queen of Swords’ behavior. This sense of limitation and weakness, feeling trapped, not in control, and there could be some of that self-blame sprouting up there as well as at this point he would have really solidified his position as the one responsible for his and his sister’s well-being.

The reversed 4 of Pentacles carries this aggressiveness to it, something close to the attitude of the Queen of Swords, but here it’s more about control and authority. Again, he had all of this pressure on him to be the one in charge, to take care of himself and his sister, while dealing with whatever it is that their parents were doing and simply try to deal with the emotional toll of it all. The reversed 4 of Pentacles could suggest some more aggressive or short-tempered dealings in terms of how he handled things with his parents and his sister at this time.

Adult Years:

Most Prominent Influence: Sacral Chakra

Supplementary Energies/Timeline: 6 of Swords + 9 of Swords + Strength (rev.)

Everything here in the adult years seems to bounce from one major phase to another pretty rapidly. Judging from this, with the Sacral Chakra suggesting an influence and priority of personal will leading to the 6 of Swords, it’s almost as if there was some kind of wake-up call that brought him to the desire to want to move on. Specifically, it feels like he recognized his own mentality, his own toxicity in a way, and then chose for the sake of his family, or maybe just his sister, to leave them in order to pursue work or education, something he thought he would be able to return to them with and offer a better life, more stability. Of course, that isn’t what happened.

The nightmare of his sister’s suicide, as well as that self-blame, culminates there with the 9 of Swords. Not much I can really say about that, it just is what it is.

The reversed Strength card interested me the most as this really felt like the perception of his own self-punishment. Basically, I was seeing Strength leaning more into its connection with Leo, with the Sun, with being seen and being heard. In reverse, this all goes away, the spotlight shuts off and your existence becomes a weak and flickering mirage in the distance. The fact that this is being shown with a major arcana as well makes it seem as if he held the perception that this was something done for his soul, this punishment was meant to cleanse his soul. Again, I feel like there could have been some spiritual or religious influence in relation to the choice to do a “vow of silence.”

End of Life:

Most Prominent Influence: Transition

Supplementary Energies/Timeline: The Empress (rev.) + Ace of Swords + Ace of Wands

I quite like this. The influence of Transition there suggests a completion, or a perceived completion of this phase in his life, something he made peace with on some level. It definitely feels like he did live to be “older,” but honestly, it feels more like a maturity thing, not so much an age thing. Really, I think he only lived into his 50’s. Whether it’s because he got sick or injured, the reversed Empress points to him not being able to take care of himself, literally not being able to farm, or live off the land. I don’t think, even in desperation, he would have actually gone and asked for help, and instead allowed himself to sort of fade out and pass on.

What’s most interesting here are the Aces, the Ace of Swords and the Ace of Wands. It seems like this lifetime, as it was the one to immediately precede this current incarnation, is one where he experienced a jump. By that I mean, nearly as soon as he died, he “jumped,” or his soul jumped into the next incarnation, into the next body, back into collective purpose with the Soul Body. The Ace of Swords is like a commitment to being heard while the Ace of Wands is a commitment to being seen, to making sure the people around him that he cares about are seen and heard, both commitments made on his deathbed, right before incarnating into this lifetime as Kim Namjoon.

How Namjoon Saw Himself: Strength

The State of His Soul: The High Priestess

In this past life, Namjoon saw himself as Strength in the more literal sense, as a strong and stable person, someone who was meant to care for others and provide a foundation. Even after his sister died he still saw himself in this light as he cared for himself and was able to quite literally build a new foundation for himself with his home and farm.

On a soul level, he resonates with The High Priestess, which really just points to his soul being no different than what it was when he popped into his current incarnation. This has more to do with the processing of the soul, or the time and lifetimes given to all seven of the guys to basically get used to living separately. I think I’ve mentioned it before in Yoongi and Jimin’s past life readings how there were plenty of lifetimes where they were on their own, or only met up two, three, or four at a time, hardly ever coming together as all seven as they needed to be able to stabilize and recognize themselves as separate souls before working together again in the Soul Body.

How Other People Remembered Namjoon: Ten of Pentacles (rev.) + The Hierophant

How He Was Meant To Be Seen: Five of Swords

This is kind of dramatic, but I could not for the life of me get any cards to come out while asking how other people SAW Namjoon in this past life, but when I switched it to how people REMEMBERED him I finally got an answer. This mentality around not being seen by other people bleeds into everything and because of that, the reversed Ten of Pentacles and The Hierophant is more so about how people saw Namjoon in this past life before his sister died, or before he moved to live on that hill.

The reversed Ten of Pentacles suggests major instability, especially in the home life, which would have been recognizable to anyone that knew him or his family personally. Alongside that, however, he specifically was seen as The Hierophant, as a stable leader in this mix, a guiding light of sorts, someone who could take care of things and be in charge while also offering some kind of peace or wholeness. In this sense, there is a connection back to the reversed 4 of Pentacles though where on the outside he may have seemed a bit more level-headed, but he did perhaps have a bit of a temper due to the stress.

He was meant to be seen as the Five of Swords, as chaotic, argumentative, hostile in some way. Basically, this is what the reversed 4 of Pentacles would have been if he didn’t have some sense of responsibility toward his sister. He would have just run right off the rails.

Main Purpose In This Past Life: Death

What Was Accomplished: Queen of Cups

This pretty much sums everything up and does show that what this past life was meant to give him in terms of experience and tools to carry over into the current incarnation was delivered and fulfilled. Death is representing literal death, it is also representing transition through death, through natural but seemingly out of control triggers that shift you into a new state of being. There is an interesting connection between recognizing the mirroring of death, where when someone or something around you dies or simply stops existing the way that it used to, part of you dies as well in order to be reborn into a reality where what has died is no longer part of the picture. It’s a rebirth that would allow you to acclimate or calibrate to the new state of being, allow you to fit into the new reality.

The Queen of Cups is very interesting. In this deck specifically, this card has the keywords, “intuition, devotion, mystery, control of emotions.” Three out of four of those qualities really transferred over very clearly, especially the matter of emotional control and devotion. However, mystery seems to be what he’s working on now, the matter of accepting mystery, accepting what can not be fully understood or predicted through logic and intuition, such as what he is now facing on a soul and conscious level in terms of this transition to a lower vibration, and a more internalized perspective. This makes me think of what The Hermit represented in his energy reading, that point in which you can look back and understand the pattern and purpose of what you went through, something that is sometimes an impossible to solve mystery while you are in the midst of it.

Most Significant Connection: Knight of Wands

What Was Gained From This Connection: The Devil

This was an odd set to get because the Knight of Wands felt completely empty, there was no energy to it, not image really, and it just felt completely flat. It took me a while to realize that this Knight of Wands represents his father in this past life. There were little to no details of his parents in this lifetime by choice. There was a very pointed decision to not carry over too much influence of his younger years, which is why most of those visuals were so clear later on in life, in the parts that are more influential now.

The Knight of Wands in general is spontaneous, excitable, adventurous, but can sometimes read as careless or self-serving depending on what it projects at the moment. There can be an aggressiveness to it through the Fire energy as well.

The Devil is what his father, and maybe both of his parents, lent to him in this past life. The Devil has the keywords of, “addiction, unhealthy influence, corruption, materialism.” I don’t think I need to explain too much about that.

More than anything I think we should just be very, very happy for Namjoon and the fact that in this current lifetime, he has incredibly wonderful and supportive parents.

Influences, Tools, Lessons Being Accessed Now:

Pig Spirit — Use your mind wisely.

Owl Spirit — You see clearly now.

Dog Spirit — Be loyal to what you love.

This very much registers as the Queen of Cups, especially in relation to intuition, emotional control, and devotion. As I said, these are the aspects that carried over very cleanly and are definitely tools and lessons he accesses frequently.

Goals or Outlook Stemming From This Past Life:

Breathe + Mending + Between Worlds

This comes from that end-of-life state around Transition. This is a much higher influence or awareness, but one that does settle into the conscious mind. Basically, it’s like one of those things where you can give out really good advice, but you never seem to be able to listen to yourself and take your own advice. Essentially, Breathe, Mending, and Between Worlds are an outlook on gracefully and with gratitude riding the waves of life, willfully stepping into new phases without any hesitation, fear, or lack of trust. This literally seems like something he would preach in a blog post, but he’s currently working against that because he feels like he’s not in control.

But, as I said, that “mystery” of control and meaning behind this descent is something he is going to figure out as he goes, and maybe then he’ll be able to fully hold this perspective for himself on a conscious level.

Something For Namjoon To Remember From This Past Life:

Supermoon — Emotions are running high!

New Moon in Leo — Confidence is your key to success.

New Moon in Virgo — A time to give rather than take.

These here are reminders for Namjoon, something he would be able to hold onto or apply to his current state if he were to have gotten this reading for himself. The message of the Supermoon, “emotions are running high!” would be a reminder in relation to the reversed 4 of Pentacles, that temperamental state, one where his emotions can fog his logic, either making him aggressive or, in the case of his current incarnation, very anxious and potentially pessimistic.

Alongside that, “confidence is your key to success,” coming from the New Moon in Leo, connecting back to Strength both in the Adult Years section and in how he saw himself in this past life, reminds him of his capability and potential. It can also be looked at as being more literal in the sense that his trust and belief in himself is what allows him to access that higher awareness, those inner lessons, and tools that are inherently part of who he is.

And finally, “a time to give rather than take,” from the New Moon in Virgo, seems to really center in on this current lifetime. In a very straightforward way, it’s like this past life, and all of his past lives really, were lessons he was to take into himself, and now all of his experiences are meant to be given out, displayed for people around him and his audience to learn and grow from. He’s not only experiencing this kind of transition for himself, he’s experiencing it, taking the brunt of it, for a lot of people. This is why he is not meant to stay in The Hermit mode forever, it is part of his job, as an individual soul, separate from the Soul Body, to teach and help people heal through his own experiences.

That’s all I have for this one. I hope you found it interesting, and thank you for reading.