For this reading, I was just focusing on his overall energy and the most prominent and stable projection he has coming from his core, and with that, as I was getting into the reading, I was getting a lot of visuals concerning the energetic connections he has stemming from his core. Usually, I will see energy lines as literal lines, just like tightly pulled strings from one person’s core to another, or maybe a core to a soul, or another layer of consciousness, but his energy lines were almost like octopus tentacles. They were a lot thicker towards the core and tapered off as they extended out, and they were very wavy. Rather than stable connections, it was like he’s energetically reaching for something or, more accurately, feeling around from someone or something, maybe multiple people. 

The first card out for him was the 5 of Wands which, in the traditional Rider-Waite deck, does depict scattered energy lines as in the form of people beating each other with sticks. It shows opposition and resistance, just a state of stagnation brought on by this tension or argument. For him, however, it’s not so severe, it literally just seemed like a confirmation that what I was seeing is what he projects the most often. He projects this kind of open doorway or an extended hand for people to grab onto. Literally, anyone can grab onto it and kind of enter his space, but on some level, he is reaching out for very specifical people or very specific things, so it seems like the tension comes from this lack of fulfillment. He has all these people or these things around him and he loves them, but they’re not really filling a certain void. I did see that he is a Libra and that seems like a very Libra-esque kind of situation to be in, especially since he’s in his early 20’s.

The next card out was the 3 of Swords which is about heartbreak and loss, which was then followed by The Empress and The High Priestess, both of which were reversed. The Empress immediately took me to this feeling of being without emotional support, or more literally lacking a mother. The connections that he is reaching for could be his family, especially his mother, or another maternal figure. With the reversed High Priestess there’s this kind of “internal damnation” which was such a weird phrase to see with this card, but it’s around literally not being able to bridge the gap. The High Priestess is a gateway, a meeting point, so with her in reverse, it’s like the connections that the tentacle energy is reaching for can’t be made, but it’s not being made due to personal reasons within himself or due to situations that are ultimately out of his control that he still somehow blames himself for.

The idea of family kept coming up after these three cards were laid out and I started getting these visuals that kind of pointed to trying to find a family in people who aren’t actually his family, hence the connections being made that lack fulfillment. I would assume this has to do with continuously trying to find a sense of family within his group or amongst his peers, and just not getting what he needs or the relationships aren’t meeting his standards on a deeper subconscious level. Again, there’s a focus on reaching for the mother, so there’s a need for very stable emotional nurturing and support, which is probably hard to find in a group of young men that are all around the same age as him going through the same struggles and handling the same stress.

The last two cards out were very separated from the other projection and I found this to be the most interesting. It’s Death alongside the reversed 7 of Pentacles. Specifically, he is projecting the idea or the perception of Death towards the issues of the reversed 7 of Pentacles. Basically, this explains why the energy lines were appearing so thick towards the core but so thin the further they were extending out. This pair of cards display energy where he’s pretty much handing out the emotional support, or just support in general, that he would like to have handed back to him. He’s giving people way more than he’s getting in return, or at least that’s how it feels for him, and because of that, there’s this black hole kind of situation going on where even when those tentacles grab onto something it feels like nothing is there, it feels like Death.

Overall, he kind of reminds me of my uncle, who is also a Libra. A very sensitive and emotional Libra with a Leo Moon who seems to have a subconscious mantra of, “I need you to feel what I feel because that’s the only way I know you’re actually here and I’m not alone.” Bang Chan seems to have a very deep need for stability and a sense of safety within relationships and he projects that by trying to offer the same stability and safety to people around him. He could be reaching for maternal connections by being a maternal figure himself in the sense that he is much more emotionally driven when it comes to how he supports and nurtures other people.